2/17/08

Nice guys don't get paid.

In the spirit of Valentine's Day (everyone's favorite day!), I'd just like to say something that I've thought for a very long time: Nice guys don't finish last.

They don't. Contrary to the Green Day song, nice guys are actually highly sought after and rather nice to keep around. The problem is, guys who classify themselves as "nice guys" often are not. Per my observations, I've found them to be whiny saps.

The guys who all say "nice guys finish last, girls want a guy who's going to treat her like crap, girls need a chase and I just can't do that" blah blah blah tend to be wimps. Wimps are bad. Nice guys are good.

And if anyone is going be whining in a relationship, it's going to be me, capiche?

I've been whining a considerable amount in recent days since The Day of My Noose was Thursday, so I've tried to find people who will share in my misery. I can count on a few fellows I know to at least hate the day with me, but a couple really boo-hooed (not literally; there were no actual tears) about how they're great and they wanted a Valentine and they know girls who didn't get anything from the guys they're dating and that's not OK and they would treat a girl so well but they're too nice and they can never get anywhere, etc etc.

Please.

You think you're too nice? No such thing. Too whiny? Ding! I can't speak for all the other girls I know, but I don't want somebody to fall all over themselves for me. It's nice that the potential is there, believe me, but please don't actually do it.

And that whole "girls just want a guy who makes them work for attention" thing is a load of crap as well. I'll admit, a little hard-to-get is OK, but there's a line between "hard to get" and "please don't get me at all." Sometimes that line is hard to recognize, especially when a girl doesn't want to see it. But it's there and if a girl willingly ignores it, well, that's just something you handle on a case-by-case basis. But girls generally don't go seeking out guys who will run away from them unless they have issues (points at self).

But a chase is preferable to having everything you could ever want dropped in your lap (although there's a point where that starts to shift; I think I'm reaching it).

I don't guess I know how exactly to define a "nice" guy, but he's not whiny. And he's not a pushover. It varies per person, those characteristics are not positive attributes.

Let's shift subjects, shall we? Onto the stream-of-consciousness part of the post you might actually read:

Spring break is in two weeks. Everything for ASB is in order. I am beyond excited for my site and my girls.

Today there was a guy sitting outside Starbucks asking people for money, etc. One guy brought him inside, bought him coffee and a pastry, then sat with him for a while outside and talked to him. I stared half the time because I was so happy that people like that really do exist and also because I couldn't help but wonder if I'm big enough to do the same thing. I'm not. He came back in later and asked for a refill on his coffee, and whoever was working said they didn't do free refills, even though the barista that had left not long ago said she'd refill it for him. So he went back outside, where he stayed for about 15 minutes before leaving. I could have bought him coffee or said that Jami told him she'd refill for him, but I didn't. I thought about it. I don't know why I didn't, and I'm really mad at myself for not doing anything. I feel like a hypocrite sometimes because I'm in all these service organizations and I'll volunteer my life away, but I can't just buy some guy more coffee? Rarely am I disappointed in myself, but this time I am.

I wrote a story today. It was short and not my best, but I haven't written fiction in a few months. Before you ask, no, you may not read it. I feel better about my writing than I did a year ago, but that doesn't mean I want to share it. If I ever let someone read my stories, I'll probably marry them.

Speaking of getting married, WE is showing marathons of all my favorite bridal shows. I just watched "My Big Fat Fabulous Wedding," and some girl spent ... wait for it ... wait for it ... $775,000 OF HER NEW HUSBAND'S (who is about 50; she's like 20 I think) MONEY on the wedding. Her dress was $6,500. Holy god. For one day.

I'm going to the $99 David's Bridal sale and will be happy to have a cotton candy machine at the reception.