I've been meaning to do some kind of 2008 wrap-up, but every start I make feels like it doesn't even do justice to the year that was. At the risk of sounding all sentimental and stuff, I'm going to remember this year for quite some time. It was full of really high highs and really low lows, and maybe some points in between, but extremes were the name of the game. I don't know how ot sum up everything; I could write paragraph after paragraph in sickening detail about every little thing, but why? So I can go back and think really hard about some of the crap I put up with? Nah. So for your reading ease and my emotional ease, here is 2008: Abridged.
January: School. Took 18 hours. Thought it would manageable AS A SECOND-SEMESTER SENIOR. It was, for about three days. Started getting ASB stuff going and realized it would be a slight headache. Lived in the newsroom. Started The Great Resume Mail-Out to every newspaper for which I could find the name and address of a managing editor.
February: Still tried to fool myself into thinking 18 hours was manageable. Slipped a little but what else is new? Witnessed the Versus Valentine Debacle. Laughed hysterically whenever I thought of it. Moped that I had no Valentine. Rejection letters resulting from said mail-out began arriving. Forgot what self-esteem was. Lived in the newsroom. Worked like a maniac on ASB stuff and realized it would be worth it.
March: Totally slacking on classes. Go figure. Keeping up, but barely. Really only cared about Guralnick's class. Lived in the newsroom. Loved ASB. Jarred got fired. I took over The Hustler. My life promptly fell apart. Cried at least twice a day. In one week only managed to sleep 5 hours. Would occasionally forget to eat. Yelled at a lot of people, including some who didn't deserve it. Stopped going to class because I was afraid to be out of the newsroom. Updated the resume and continued to canvass the U.S. with that and my clips. More rejection.
April: Wait, I had class? Never missed Guralnick's though. Realized I AM a good writer. Not good enough to write a paper without reading the book and think the professor wouldn't figure me out. Cried a lot more. Had my first panic attack. Would I graduate? Thought I was going to fail two classes. Took SND Quick Course and gave my resume to everyone there. Got a call from the T-U. Got an interview from the T-U. Got a job from the T-U (on the last day of class). Saw Steve Earle. Cried during my favorite song. Still had to finish paper to get grade for a class. Didn't sleep for three days straight in order to finish paper. Did not finish paper. Lived in the newsroom. More Hustler drama.
May: Flew to Jacksonville to look for place to live. Found it. Foolishly thought I could afford it. Wrote paper that was due last month on plane home. Finished paper at the very last second possible. Got a sympathy grade that let me pass. Washed my hands of the newspaper. Drank heavily and threw up a lot. Symbolic. GRADUATED. Moved to Jacksonville. Started job. Thought I would do horribly. I didn't? Fancied myself well-adjusted.
June: Beaches. Sunburns. Made a handful of friends in the newsroom. Nothing else remarkable. Still fancied myself well-adjusted. Got kittens. Mom visited. Bought furniture. Bad choice. Started Scrabbling heavily with Pat.
July: Friends invited me with them for the Fourth. Realized, "Hey, these people actually care about me!" Got friendly with more people in the newsroom. Melted in Florida heat. Living alone is expensive. Found good places to drive around when I need to drive around.
August: Started working on the daily. Started missing home. Started wanting to broaden social circle. Got scared of my first "hurricane." Acted like a Tennessean with the snow and stocked up on bread, water and toilet paper. Lost power for three days. Met The Boy. Realized I very much liked The Boy. More work nonsense.
September: Whispers of layoffs in the newsroom. Rumors are just that. The Boy and I continue to hang out. Make wonderful friends on the news desk.
October: Birthday month! Work continues. Layoff whispers get a little louder. Start working more on the daily than on communities. Things with The Boy keep going well. Things with new friends going well. BIRTHDAY! More than I could ask for. Cat breaks her toe.
November: Layoffs become reality. One of my fantastic friends gets the boot. Another friend quits. Morale drops to frightening lows. Spend Thanksgiving with The Boy's family. Awesome. Homesick.
December: Go home for a few days. The Boy meets the family. Glad to be home but glad when I get back to Jacksonville. Work work work. Christmas is OK. Work work work. New Year's Eve is fun. Fireworks. New year.
And there you have it, my year in brief. Despite all the lows, I think the highs were enough to get me through it all. I graduated. I got a pretty decent job. I got a great boyfriend.
As soon as I was finished with The Hustler, I could breathe. In just a couple days, my whole self did a 180 and I was finally OK again. I didn't have anything to worry about, I didn't have to stay up until 5 a.m., I had nothing to keep me up until 5 a.m. It's funny; things seemed to just get mediocre and routine after all that, but they weren't. They were finally just normal.
So my year was sucky, and so was everyone else's. I guess 2008 was just Year of the Suck, and now it's time to move on and find something good to look forward to this year. I know what I'm looking forward to, and it's finally something that I want because I want it not because it's going to rescue from a crap situation (much the way I looked at graduation; no more drama). And for once, I'm excited about a new year and seeing what new things happen and how much is going to change in these next 12 months. It's a pretty long time.
Showing posts with label Nashville. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Nashville. Show all posts
1/5/09
2/17/08
Nice guys don't get paid.
In the spirit of Valentine's Day (everyone's favorite day!), I'd just like to say something that I've thought for a very long time: Nice guys don't finish last.
They don't. Contrary to the Green Day song, nice guys are actually highly sought after and rather nice to keep around. The problem is, guys who classify themselves as "nice guys" often are not. Per my observations, I've found them to be whiny saps.
The guys who all say "nice guys finish last, girls want a guy who's going to treat her like crap, girls need a chase and I just can't do that" blah blah blah tend to be wimps. Wimps are bad. Nice guys are good.
And if anyone is going be whining in a relationship, it's going to be me, capiche?
I've been whining a considerable amount in recent days since The Day of My Noose was Thursday, so I've tried to find people who will share in my misery. I can count on a few fellows I know to at least hate the day with me, but a couple really boo-hooed (not literally; there were no actual tears) about how they're great and they wanted a Valentine and they know girls who didn't get anything from the guys they're dating and that's not OK and they would treat a girl so well but they're too nice and they can never get anywhere, etc etc.
Please.
You think you're too nice? No such thing. Too whiny? Ding! I can't speak for all the other girls I know, but I don't want somebody to fall all over themselves for me. It's nice that the potential is there, believe me, but please don't actually do it.
And that whole "girls just want a guy who makes them work for attention" thing is a load of crap as well. I'll admit, a little hard-to-get is OK, but there's a line between "hard to get" and "please don't get me at all." Sometimes that line is hard to recognize, especially when a girl doesn't want to see it. But it's there and if a girl willingly ignores it, well, that's just something you handle on a case-by-case basis. But girls generally don't go seeking out guys who will run away from them unless they have issues (points at self).
But a chase is preferable to having everything you could ever want dropped in your lap (although there's a point where that starts to shift; I think I'm reaching it).
I don't guess I know how exactly to define a "nice" guy, but he's not whiny. And he's not a pushover. It varies per person, those characteristics are not positive attributes.
Let's shift subjects, shall we? Onto the stream-of-consciousness part of the post you might actually read:
Spring break is in two weeks. Everything for ASB is in order. I am beyond excited for my site and my girls.
Today there was a guy sitting outside Starbucks asking people for money, etc. One guy brought him inside, bought him coffee and a pastry, then sat with him for a while outside and talked to him. I stared half the time because I was so happy that people like that really do exist and also because I couldn't help but wonder if I'm big enough to do the same thing. I'm not. He came back in later and asked for a refill on his coffee, and whoever was working said they didn't do free refills, even though the barista that had left not long ago said she'd refill it for him. So he went back outside, where he stayed for about 15 minutes before leaving. I could have bought him coffee or said that Jami told him she'd refill for him, but I didn't. I thought about it. I don't know why I didn't, and I'm really mad at myself for not doing anything. I feel like a hypocrite sometimes because I'm in all these service organizations and I'll volunteer my life away, but I can't just buy some guy more coffee? Rarely am I disappointed in myself, but this time I am.
I wrote a story today. It was short and not my best, but I haven't written fiction in a few months. Before you ask, no, you may not read it. I feel better about my writing than I did a year ago, but that doesn't mean I want to share it. If I ever let someone read my stories, I'll probably marry them.
Speaking of getting married, WE is showing marathons of all my favorite bridal shows. I just watched "My Big Fat Fabulous Wedding," and some girl spent ... wait for it ... wait for it ... $775,000 OF HER NEW HUSBAND'S (who is about 50; she's like 20 I think) MONEY on the wedding. Her dress was $6,500. Holy god. For one day.
I'm going to the $99 David's Bridal sale and will be happy to have a cotton candy machine at the reception.
They don't. Contrary to the Green Day song, nice guys are actually highly sought after and rather nice to keep around. The problem is, guys who classify themselves as "nice guys" often are not. Per my observations, I've found them to be whiny saps.
The guys who all say "nice guys finish last, girls want a guy who's going to treat her like crap, girls need a chase and I just can't do that" blah blah blah tend to be wimps. Wimps are bad. Nice guys are good.
And if anyone is going be whining in a relationship, it's going to be me, capiche?
I've been whining a considerable amount in recent days since The Day of My Noose was Thursday, so I've tried to find people who will share in my misery. I can count on a few fellows I know to at least hate the day with me, but a couple really boo-hooed (not literally; there were no actual tears) about how they're great and they wanted a Valentine and they know girls who didn't get anything from the guys they're dating and that's not OK and they would treat a girl so well but they're too nice and they can never get anywhere, etc etc.
Please.
You think you're too nice? No such thing. Too whiny? Ding! I can't speak for all the other girls I know, but I don't want somebody to fall all over themselves for me. It's nice that the potential is there, believe me, but please don't actually do it.
And that whole "girls just want a guy who makes them work for attention" thing is a load of crap as well. I'll admit, a little hard-to-get is OK, but there's a line between "hard to get" and "please don't get me at all." Sometimes that line is hard to recognize, especially when a girl doesn't want to see it. But it's there and if a girl willingly ignores it, well, that's just something you handle on a case-by-case basis. But girls generally don't go seeking out guys who will run away from them unless they have issues (points at self).
But a chase is preferable to having everything you could ever want dropped in your lap (although there's a point where that starts to shift; I think I'm reaching it).
I don't guess I know how exactly to define a "nice" guy, but he's not whiny. And he's not a pushover. It varies per person, those characteristics are not positive attributes.
Let's shift subjects, shall we? Onto the stream-of-consciousness part of the post you might actually read:
Spring break is in two weeks. Everything for ASB is in order. I am beyond excited for my site and my girls.
Today there was a guy sitting outside Starbucks asking people for money, etc. One guy brought him inside, bought him coffee and a pastry, then sat with him for a while outside and talked to him. I stared half the time because I was so happy that people like that really do exist and also because I couldn't help but wonder if I'm big enough to do the same thing. I'm not. He came back in later and asked for a refill on his coffee, and whoever was working said they didn't do free refills, even though the barista that had left not long ago said she'd refill it for him. So he went back outside, where he stayed for about 15 minutes before leaving. I could have bought him coffee or said that Jami told him she'd refill for him, but I didn't. I thought about it. I don't know why I didn't, and I'm really mad at myself for not doing anything. I feel like a hypocrite sometimes because I'm in all these service organizations and I'll volunteer my life away, but I can't just buy some guy more coffee? Rarely am I disappointed in myself, but this time I am.
I wrote a story today. It was short and not my best, but I haven't written fiction in a few months. Before you ask, no, you may not read it. I feel better about my writing than I did a year ago, but that doesn't mean I want to share it. If I ever let someone read my stories, I'll probably marry them.
Speaking of getting married, WE is showing marathons of all my favorite bridal shows. I just watched "My Big Fat Fabulous Wedding," and some girl spent ... wait for it ... wait for it ... $775,000 OF HER NEW HUSBAND'S (who is about 50; she's like 20 I think) MONEY on the wedding. Her dress was $6,500. Holy god. For one day.
I'm going to the $99 David's Bridal sale and will be happy to have a cotton candy machine at the reception.
9/11/07
Rock and roll razorblade
Last night, all of my middle-school dreams came true. I saw Hanson play live.
It was special because I love them and have loved them for many moons, but the evening was also very special because yesterday marked, to the day, the 10-year anniversary of the release of "MMMBop." So they performed it acoustically. It was beautiful. Taylor "Oh, yeah!"-ed the night away, and I screamed like I was on a roller coaster for three hours. Wouldn't you scream too if you saw this?
But really, they rocked. They didn't play all that much from "Middle of Nowhere" and instead played a good chunk of their new album and "Underneath." It made me very happy. They did, however, play "Yearbook," which they have NEVER played live until last night. I almost cried when Taylor sang about Johnny and "turning to that paaaAAAGE"!
So many people have made fun of me for being so excited, but Hanson were so good! They aren't the 12-year-olds everyone still wants them to be. However, there were very few people there under the age of 17. And that's pushing it. But the beauty of the show was that the fans and Hanson have grown together. Their new stuff wouldn't appeal to my 11-year-old self, but their new stuff definitely does. So does the way they look.
Even Isaac has gotten cute. He's really grown into his features.
All in all, it was a magical evening. Carly came too because she might be their biggest fan. I'm pretty sure we both teared up at least twice. It was like Christmas but better.
It was special because I love them and have loved them for many moons, but the evening was also very special because yesterday marked, to the day, the 10-year anniversary of the release of "MMMBop." So they performed it acoustically. It was beautiful. Taylor "Oh, yeah!"-ed the night away, and I screamed like I was on a roller coaster for three hours. Wouldn't you scream too if you saw this?
But really, they rocked. They didn't play all that much from "Middle of Nowhere" and instead played a good chunk of their new album and "Underneath." It made me very happy. They did, however, play "Yearbook," which they have NEVER played live until last night. I almost cried when Taylor sang about Johnny and "turning to that paaaAAAGE"!
So many people have made fun of me for being so excited, but Hanson were so good! They aren't the 12-year-olds everyone still wants them to be. However, there were very few people there under the age of 17. And that's pushing it. But the beauty of the show was that the fans and Hanson have grown together. Their new stuff wouldn't appeal to my 11-year-old self, but their new stuff definitely does. So does the way they look.
Even Isaac has gotten cute. He's really grown into his features.
All in all, it was a magical evening. Carly came too because she might be their biggest fan. I'm pretty sure we both teared up at least twice. It was like Christmas but better.
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