Oh yeah, wedding blogging

This is my millionth pathetic attempt to revive my blog. In the many, many months since last I posted (which didn't even count), oh so much has happened. The boy and I adjusted to cohabitation, bought a house (hello, suburbia) and got engaged. I'm hoping that by forcing myself to compose the occasional wedding-related post, I'll start writing for real (?) again.

I wrote a guest post for The Plunge Project, the wedding blog of a Knoxvillian, Nicole (who has ties to Jacksonville...tiny world), and it was fun to write and share and talk about all this bullshit like it really matters. Which it does. But no one takes you seriously when you are fretting about flowers. They just don't. But by god, I can put it in a blog and I will feel better.

That said, I need to bring up a very important issue: the Serious Face wedding portrait. A handful of my high school acquaintances have gotten married recently, and after seeing their pictures, it seems like this is the big trend.

I speak only for myself here, but really, I can’t say I’m a fan. I don’t want to offend anyone because everyone wants to remember their wedding in their own way, but I just can’t get behind the Serious Face. I’ve only seen a few shots where the people don’t look kind of angry or where they’re gunning to be Male Model of the year.

Weddings are fun and exciting; I can’t imagine not having a big ridiculous smile on my face in all my pictures. I want to look back and think how happy I was all day and now how I had to force myself into a Serious Face look — or, worse, that making a not-happy face was easy.

I think there is definitely a place for pictures in which everyone isn't all smiley, but it's about looking thoughtful, not like you're throwing eye daggers at your photographer. However, I wonder if the Serious Face is a trend that photogs are latching onto and encouraging of their subjects. We have fabulous photogs, and I've seen lots of their work, so I can't imagine them suggesting it, but I really doubt I'd be enthused to go along with it if they did.

Of course, it's your wedding blah blah blah, but I just don't understand why anyone would at any point just not want to look totally happy.

False alarm

Last time I wrote here, it tricked even me. I planned on getting back in the swing of things and at least writing something occasionally funny or weird or potentially even insightful, but that didn't work out. I don't even blame Twitter anymore; I'm just lazy. I also lose track of topics I think would be good to write about, mostly because they're in the political realm, and sometimes I worry that I come off sounding like an idiot. So I Twitter away and think about things, and that's pretty much that. I also have little interest in coming home to read and write on a computer when I spend all my time at work reading and writing on a computer.

See? That was pretty much it.

It's been so long

Oh blog, ye of great neglect! I have really good intentions all the time to actually write stuff on a regular basis, but by the time I actually sit down to do it, I don't want to anymore. I don't have exciting stories unless I talk about work, and that's something I try to avoid in public forums, and the current events I have something to say about are often no longer that current by the time I get around to the ol' blog.

But I didn't want the entire month of August to go by without posting SOMETHING, so here's this little survey, via Sam. Once upon a time, I had a LiveJournal and that sucker was fulllll of teh surveys. I had a lot of time on my hands.4

1. Where did you go on your first airplane ride?
To L.A. to visit the aforementioned Sam during sophomore year of college. I was a little freaked out, but she held my hand and I was OK.

2. What is your earliest memory?
Uhhhhh hitting my head on a table at preschool and needing stitches. I can't think of anything specific from prior to that. Maybe that's why?

3. What was your second grade teacher's name?
Ms. Bonville. When we had to go to the bathroom she would ask us "Number one or number two?" to keep track of about how long we should be gone (we were wanderers). I once answered "number three!" I was an asshole from an early age (but really, I probably just had to go).

4. What was the last thing you watched on tv?
America's Best Dance Crew. I can't do anything.

5. My uncle once:
I have a few uncles. Ummmm...Harrison once gave me a super cool Skipper doll for Christmas. She had a little toy puppy. I love(d) Barbie.

6. How long was your longest relationship?
A year and a week, as of today.

7. What do you want to be?
Asleep? Not hungry? Thin? Smarter? More well read? Less poor? A better cook? Seriously, this is a really unfair question.

8. What was the last thing you received in the mail?
A bill. Huzzah!

9. If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?
I can only pick one? More education for women.

10. Would you prefer 10 inches of snow or 100 degree weather?
Snooooooooooooow!

11. What is your homepage set to?
A blank screen. My computer doesn't cooperate if it's asked to do something right away. Having an actual homepage would just crash Safari.

12. Last 5 websites you visited:
Gmail, Facebook, Google reader, Twitter, Twitpic

13. Were you a planned baby?
I find it unlikely. It's my understanding there was a cold snap around January/February 1985 in East Tennessee. My BFF's birthday is only two days after mine, and her parents lived just up the hill from mine. It was cold. What do you expect?

14. What do you believe is the meaning of life?
I was going to start writing the "sperm" song from Monty Python's Meaning of Life, but this is a family environment here. Oh wait. That was a joke and I didn't even mean to make it!

15. What bill do you hate paying the most?
All of them? I guess the utilities. Air conditioning should be free because THIS IS FLORIDA.

16. How many schools did you attend through grade twelve?
Just two. Wearwood for K-8, and GP for 9-12.

17. The Cosby Show or The Simpsons?
The Simpsons, for definitely.

18. Three signs summer is here:
It's not January. That's about it.

19. The last time you had your feelings hurt:
Yesterday.

20. Who was your first best friend?
Audrey, when we were in preschool. And then her family moved to Idaho.

WHAT have I done?

Note: I started this post on April 1. I got sidetracked and forgot about it. Now it's April 6. NaBloPoMo FAIL. Anyway.

Because I am follower, I signed up for NaBloPoMo (Brumley, get excited) because all my favorite bloggers are doing it. Well, a couple of them are doing it. And now I'm going to post something every single day for the month of April. Fuck, why couldn't I have done this in February, since it has so few days? Ahhhh, hindsight is 20/20.

Since I really missed the whole blog-every-day boat, I feel like I should have some good, clever, well thought out post ready to deliver to you, my loyal reader. Unfortunately, I don't. I blame my job. And Twitter. At work, I'm in front of a computer all day long, and when I'm not at work, I spend my computer time catching up on my favorite blogs and looking for fun recipes. Seriously. I don't even watch YouTube anymore, which is really saying something because I love YouTube.

And Twitter. It is at the root of the problem. I spend my day tweeting my random thoughts and posting links and such, and by the time I try to sit down and write a coherent blog post, it amounts to nothing more than a rehash of the day's tweets. Lame.

So that's why I signed up for NaBloPoMo. I figured that might keep me accountable, you know, force me to write SOMETHING on this thing, even it's only a collection of less-than-tweet-worthy random thoughts. I also remember occasionally that it would be nice to update this thinkg so people actually know what's happening in my life, but that's also boring.

I HAVE NO LIFE. There, I said it. I go to work, I go home. Sometimes I go somewhere to get coffee and sometimes I leech off an open wireless connection I find. When I'm feeling crazy and adventurous, I'll — get ready for it — bake a cake or something. I KNOW!!!! I better caaaaallllllm down.

Anyhow. There are actually things going on in my life that are worth sharing, but I don't necessarily feel like writing about that today. Maybe tomorrow, though. Because I really have to post tomorrow. And the day after that. And so on.

And then when I run out of things to say, I'm just going to aggregate my tweets of the day for all you non-Tweeple. Because it's important that you know every crackpot musing that runs through my head at any time of the day.

Deep thoughts

This morning at the gym, I was really hoping something would happen that I could write about and make fun of later. Sadly, I was not so lucky.

There was only one older dude there when I got there, so my hopes of a good story were dashed. The only thing that happened was that Dude asked me if I was OK after I almost passed out from doing squats because I am foolish and think I can do things like that. Then he ran — RAN — on the treadmill for the rest of the time I worked out, no doubt grateful for his old man body that doesn’t try to pass out from lifting weight. I didn’t eat anything before I went, so that probably had something to do with it, although there is no excuse for fatigue when you use the embarrassingly not heavy weights I chose.

But I digress.

Well, sort of. When I’m at the gym I usually do some kind of weights and then walk on the treadmill for a half hour or something. Let me tell you, that treadmill time sucks. I don’t like walking or running unless I’m getting somewhere, and the time just draaaags by. So to entertain myself I listen to Hanson or NPR and think about Things. These Things are typically pointless and really don’t do anything to make the time pass more quickly because they aren’t really anything that requires deep thought.

Anyhow, this morning I was thinking about work. No, not my actual job because that doesn’t require a lot of outside thinking unless I’m looking at a copy of the paper, but my place of work. Specifically, I was thinking about our entrance and exit gates to the employee parking lot.

A few months ago, a good chunk of the security staff got laid off, so our gates are now the first line of defense against keeping out the riff raff. However, the entrance gate is always up — anyone can drive in, park, walk through the open distribution gate and come right on in the building! How nice of us to make it that easy. Anyway, an e-mail was sent out this week saying the exit gate is now operational and to drive slowly and it will raise when a car approaches.

Erm, what’s wrong with this picture? Why impede employees’ exit but still make it simple for anyone to drive in? I heard there was going to be a card reader installed at some point, but in the meantime, I’m just puzzled. I mean, if someone REALLY didn’t want to wait for the exit gate, couldn’t they just drive out the entrance side? I once drove in through the exit because the entrance gate was down and the guard shack was unmanned. The same thing could happen again!

I guess the parking lot has been open-access for long enough that any real threat of something bad happening is pretty minimal. Now if only they could figure out how that dog got in the parking lot last night…

2008: Good riddance

I've been meaning to do some kind of 2008 wrap-up, but every start I make feels like it doesn't even do justice to the year that was. At the risk of sounding all sentimental and stuff, I'm going to remember this year for quite some time. It was full of really high highs and really low lows, and maybe some points in between, but extremes were the name of the game. I don't know how ot sum up everything; I could write paragraph after paragraph in sickening detail about every little thing, but why? So I can go back and think really hard about some of the crap I put up with? Nah. So for your reading ease and my emotional ease, here is 2008: Abridged.

January: School. Took 18 hours. Thought it would manageable AS A SECOND-SEMESTER SENIOR. It was, for about three days. Started getting ASB stuff going and realized it would be a slight headache. Lived in the newsroom. Started The Great Resume Mail-Out to every newspaper for which I could find the name and address of a managing editor.

February: Still tried to fool myself into thinking 18 hours was manageable. Slipped a little but what else is new? Witnessed the Versus Valentine Debacle. Laughed hysterically whenever I thought of it. Moped that I had no Valentine. Rejection letters resulting from said mail-out began arriving. Forgot what self-esteem was. Lived in the newsroom. Worked like a maniac on ASB stuff and realized it would be worth it.

March: Totally slacking on classes. Go figure. Keeping up, but barely. Really only cared about Guralnick's class. Lived in the newsroom. Loved ASB. Jarred got fired. I took over The Hustler. My life promptly fell apart. Cried at least twice a day. In one week only managed to sleep 5 hours. Would occasionally forget to eat. Yelled at a lot of people, including some who didn't deserve it. Stopped going to class because I was afraid to be out of the newsroom. Updated the resume and continued to canvass the U.S. with that and my clips. More rejection.

April: Wait, I had class? Never missed Guralnick's though. Realized I AM a good writer. Not good enough to write a paper without reading the book and think the professor wouldn't figure me out. Cried a lot more. Had my first panic attack. Would I graduate? Thought I was going to fail two classes. Took SND Quick Course and gave my resume to everyone there. Got a call from the T-U. Got an interview from the T-U. Got a job from the T-U (on the last day of class). Saw Steve Earle. Cried during my favorite song. Still had to finish paper to get grade for a class. Didn't sleep for three days straight in order to finish paper. Did not finish paper. Lived in the newsroom. More Hustler drama.

May: Flew to Jacksonville to look for place to live. Found it. Foolishly thought I could afford it. Wrote paper that was due last month on plane home. Finished paper at the very last second possible. Got a sympathy grade that let me pass. Washed my hands of the newspaper. Drank heavily and threw up a lot. Symbolic. GRADUATED. Moved to Jacksonville. Started job. Thought I would do horribly. I didn't? Fancied myself well-adjusted.

June: Beaches. Sunburns. Made a handful of friends in the newsroom. Nothing else remarkable. Still fancied myself well-adjusted. Got kittens. Mom visited. Bought furniture. Bad choice. Started Scrabbling heavily with Pat.

July: Friends invited me with them for the Fourth. Realized, "Hey, these people actually care about me!" Got friendly with more people in the newsroom. Melted in Florida heat. Living alone is expensive. Found good places to drive around when I need to drive around.

August: Started working on the daily. Started missing home. Started wanting to broaden social circle. Got scared of my first "hurricane." Acted like a Tennessean with the snow and stocked up on bread, water and toilet paper. Lost power for three days. Met The Boy. Realized I very much liked The Boy. More work nonsense.

September: Whispers of layoffs in the newsroom. Rumors are just that. The Boy and I continue to hang out. Make wonderful friends on the news desk.

October: Birthday month! Work continues. Layoff whispers get a little louder. Start working more on the daily than on communities. Things with The Boy keep going well. Things with new friends going well. BIRTHDAY! More than I could ask for. Cat breaks her toe.

November: Layoffs become reality. One of my fantastic friends gets the boot. Another friend quits. Morale drops to frightening lows. Spend Thanksgiving with The Boy's family. Awesome. Homesick.

December: Go home for a few days. The Boy meets the family. Glad to be home but glad when I get back to Jacksonville. Work work work. Christmas is OK. Work work work. New Year's Eve is fun. Fireworks. New year.

And there you have it, my year in brief. Despite all the lows, I think the highs were enough to get me through it all. I graduated. I got a pretty decent job. I got a great boyfriend.

As soon as I was finished with The Hustler, I could breathe. In just a couple days, my whole self did a 180 and I was finally OK again. I didn't have anything to worry about, I didn't have to stay up until 5 a.m., I had nothing to keep me up until 5 a.m. It's funny; things seemed to just get mediocre and routine after all that, but they weren't. They were finally just normal.

So my year was sucky, and so was everyone else's. I guess 2008 was just Year of the Suck, and now it's time to move on and find something good to look forward to this year. I know what I'm looking forward to, and it's finally something that I want because I want it not because it's going to rescue from a crap situation (much the way I looked at graduation; no more drama). And for once, I'm excited about a new year and seeing what new things happen and how much is going to change in these next 12 months. It's a pretty long time.

If you're a fatty and you know it, clap your hands

I swear my kittens just clapped their little paws. Bess was snuggled up all cute next to me on the couch, when Jorge comes running in and wedges her massive self "between" Bess and me. I say "between" because it more like "on top of Bess until Bess moved over." Now Jorge is stretched out across an entire couch cushion and poor little Bess is banished to the floor. Jorge is very demanding when it comes to attention, especially attention given while she's laying on the couch. She has laid directly on my computer while I'm sitting here because I had the audacity to only pet her on the floor and not bring her up into my lap. Brats. Both of them.

Speaking of the girls getting very snuggly, now that it's cold at night, they like to sleep even more ON MY PILLOW than they already do. Last night was cold enough that it felt like home. The low was something like 29; it was 37 or something when I left at 8:45 this morning. Unacceptable. This is Florida, for crying out loud.

I wore real shoes (if you really consider flats real shoes)to work, but I didn't wear a jacket. Just a long sleeve turtleneck (not even a sweater). Some people at work though wore coats and scarves and are saying they want to put space heaters in their cubes. Pansies.

The Boy is excited about coming home with me in December, but also kind of not excited because it's going to be effin cold. Mom ambushed him last night when I was on the phone with her and asked if she could talk to him. I was like "Oh he's busy. His hands are full. [Other excuses.]" and she was like I'll wait! So they talked, and after he was like, "Maybe next time can I get some warning?"

I'm Giving Thanks with his family next week and trying to think of something to bring. His mom said I don't have to bring anything, but I feel funny coming empty handed. Apparently the whole family is on a diet ("Hi, I'm Elizabeth. I've never been on a diet and thus only know how to cook fatty Southern food. I do best when the recipe requires more than a pound of butter. Nice to meet you [y'all]!"), so that really limits my options. I'm thinking banana bread or something safe that doesn't necessarily have to go with the actual meal. Between that stress (mild though it is) and work stress and my usual high level of stress over nothing, my digestive system is rebelling against the rest of my body in a bad way. Happy Thanksgiving!

UPDATED: Eating half a bag of Swedish fish does nothing to aid in the recovery of normal digestive processes. Make note.

As long as it's not a cuckoo clock

So this weekend I went with The Boy to a work get-together at his boss' house, and everyone who was there has at least one kid, and some of them even brought their baby (or three, in the case of one of his co-workers whose poor wife popped out triplets). It was a little awkward, as The Boy and I neither are married nor have babies. But one of the babies was ultra precious and pretty cool, and we played for a long time. I mean, I pretty much ignored most of the adults and just had fun with the kid.

And last week a co-worker brought his daughter to work, and she's maybe one of the cutest baby I have ever seen and she kept looking over her shoulder and kind of raising her eyebrow at us really skeptically, and it was hilarious/endearing.

And then I looked at this (one of my favorite bloggers' Flickr stream), and now my biological clock is all TICK TICK TICK TICK TICK.

Ugh. This is my life.

How to keep newspapers alive

For as long as I can remember, I've been a bathroom reader (Exhibit A: Here), and I actually used to get in trouble for stashing American Girl magazines under the clothes hamper in the old house. I would go to the bathroom when I should have been doing chores or something and just sit and read. I would also sit and read when I was doing other, normal bathroom business. My brother is also a bathroom reader, as are most of my friends. I'm pretty convinced that almost everyone I know is a bathroom reader. If you say you have never read something in the bathroom, you're lying. I just won't believe you.

Anyhow, I've realized that bathrooms are the reason print journalism will survive, despite the current situation. How did I come to this realization? Wireless Internet is a dangerous thing, friends. I was sitting on the couch reading my favorite NYT column online, but I didn't want to give it up while I ran to the bathroom. Solution? I brought my computer with me.

While this might be a little too much information for the masses, I consider it a public service announcement. So I did my thing and finished reading the column, but I have to say bathroom reading on the computer is not the same as a magazine or newspaper or book. I suppose it's all about personal taste, but the computer doesn't really do it for me. You can't just keep it in the bathroom, and if you've got to make an especially long trip, you run the risk of the battery running out. There's also the issue of making sure you set the computer down in a place that won't get wet while you wash your hands. Granted, you have that same issue with a newspaper or magazine, but those cost a few dollars max, not a couple grand.

So, newspapers and other print news outlets should market themselves as the only reading material that accompanies people to the bathroom. Maybe some people prefer the computer, but I don't think it's anything I can ever get used to.

Improvements continue...

So today I got two important things: a haircut and new bedding. The hair is great (took off almost six inches — good riddance!) and the bedding is extra-great! I've been a little unhappy with my bedroom because it felt a little dark and not very cozy, but the new stuff brightened it up a little bit. If I can find a cute headboard on the cheap (I'm thinking of just painting the wall behind my bed to avoid hardware, etc.) and some kind of desk, I'll be good to go! Pictures of both:

I had to do the awkward MySpace-mirror picture I hate so much, but the kittens haven't yet figured out how to work the camera, so they couldn't take it for me. Sorry.)
My pretty new bed! The kittens are laying on it as I write this, so I take it they approve. And yes, I sleep with that bear. He will turn 22 years old this year, so we've been together a long time. Don't judge me.

His middle name is Hussein, you know

The other night I was reading a wire story about how Obama and McCain are making semi-nice defending each other to the big attacks and blah blah blah. Anyway, this little gem was part of the story:

At a town-hall event Friday in Minnesota, McCain took the microphone from a woman who said Obama is an Arab. McCain said, "No, ma'am," and he called Obama "a decent, family man."

Because Arabs aren't decent family men? That's right, I forget those things. OK OK, taken out of context, maybe McCain didn't mean it to sound like that — we are, after THE LIBERAL MEDIA (dun dun dunnnnnn).

Also, I'm really having a hard time with people at work who write QCs, e-mails and the like IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS. I DON'T LIKE FEELING LIKE I'M BEING YELLED AT FOR ASKING A QUESTION. Just sayin'.

Oh, and Jorge is recovering well from her broken toe. By recovering well, I mean she's running around with The Wild Eyes and playing with Bess. I think she faked the injury to test my love and to see if I would actually be concerned. She won.

Home improvement

Ah, I finally got a rug for my living room! I still have a long way to go in there in terms of making it cozier, but the rug helps. The kittens seem to enjoy it too, since they were all over it as soon as I laid it down. Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-check it out:

There's no place like home

Lately, I've been really missing Tennessee. I want to go to Nashville more than I want to breathe, and I really miss mountains and, well, I just miss land that isn't flat. I get great gas mileage here, but sometimes I miss having to gear down to make it up a hill. Also, Florida isn't as fully Southern as East TN. Or so I thought.

Jacksonville is close enough to Georgia that we get our share of rednecks, hillbillies and people who speak in terms I can understand. Today, I had to drive out to the ghetto because that's where the nearest Comcast store is located, and on my way out there, I passed a road called Confederate Point. All of a sudden, it was like I was home.

Another good story to do with home (my home here, not so much the ones in Tennessee): I locked myself out of my building last night. I keep three hooks on my living room wall on which I hang my keys, purse, etc., and when I came in I hung up my keys and not my purse. Then when I left, I grabbed my purse from the couch, locked my door on the knob (requiring no key) and went to my car. As soon as I got to my car, I realized I had no keys, and even though I tried, I couldn't break into my apartment or pick the lock. Part of me is glad that I couldn't just push my door open because it doesn't look very secure, but I would have broken the frame and probably the door if I'd gone that route. Comforting. Long story short, my landlord was out of town, but his business partner (whom I'd never met until last night) had keys and came to let me in. Good. I'm getting copies made of my keys ASAP, though, and giving them to Pat or Stef or someone reliable.

Additionally, I had to drive to the Comcast store earlier to get a new power cord for my modem. Why? Because my cats chewed through the other one. I'm surprised I didn't end up with fried kitten at some point, but thankfully I did not. Now if only I can get them to stop snoring, we'll be golden.

Oh, Sbux

People (not baristas, mind you) at Five Points Starbucks are friendlier even than people in Nashville, and that's tough. But it's an odd friendly, like a please-stop-talking-to-me-I-am-clearly-preoccupied-making-fun-of-
you-in-my-blog kind of friendly. Dude is sitting next to me reading the T-U and New York Times and asking me, "Did you hear about [fill in the blank]?"

I WORK AT A NEWSPAPER YES I PROMISE I HEARD ABOUT IT.

Also, I feel a little funny not preparing to go back to Nashville/VU. Now's about the time I'd be peacing out of Tuesday Morning and spending time "packing" and "getting my stuff together," which means I'd just be spending more time laying on the couch with Kenny and letting my mom feed me.

In other news, I'm getting a neighbor tomorrow and a new stove within a couple weeks, according to my landlord. Hooray! Four fully functional units I can cook on!

Also, I went to the beach this afternoon with Deirdre, et al. The sun wasn't terribly strong, but I laid on my stomach most of the time and the backs of my legs got burned. So I quite literally have a hot ass. Not comfortable, I'm afraid.

Pat calls her 'Shitty Kitty'

He also calls her "Jorge Georgio," but that's another story.

She hasn't slept in here for the last couple days, so she might be over whatever it was that was making her do it. I'm still wary of letting her sleep on my pillow, but sooner or later I'll forget she doesn't mind sleeping in her own shit and she'll be back in her spot.

Tweet tweet

A number of my work friends Twitter, so like the sheep that I am, I jumped on the bandwagon. I joined more to follow my friends than to update people on the things I do because frankly I don't do anything. I may Twitter my Scrabble victories, but other than that I've got nothing spectacular going on.

That's a lie. I do. Or my cat does. Anyway.

So a couple weeks after I moved to J'ville, I adopted two precious little kitties — Bess and George — from the Jacksonville Humane Society, and we've gotten along fabulously. They can be little shits sometimes (like kids!) but they're also darn cute and really sweet (unlike kids).

They both have their own little quirks and weird things, but they're mostly endearing. Except this new behavior from George where she sleeps in her litter box. In. The. Litter. Box. On her and Bess' poop. It's slightly cute but mostly gross.

I did some Googling yesterday, and all the discussion boards suggest three things:

1. She feels most secure in her litter box because she's been spooked by something or feels threatened by another cat. I don't think this is the case because it's brand new behavior and she and Bess are sisters and have always seemed to get along well.

2. A lot of shelter cats slept in their litter boxes because it's the softest place in their cage. I just switched litter, so the new stuff might be similar to what they used at the Humane Society and she just feels like it's more homey. A very likely explanation.

3. She's sick. Some cats will indicate that they don't feel well by just hanging out at the litter box all the time, whether they're actually using it or not. She seems to be using it normally and isn't feverish or anything, so this is possible but not likely. I should take her to the vet but can't afford it. Donations?

So yeah, anyone know any cat-behavior experts? I could use some help, here.